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	<title>Escape to Reality &#187; marriage</title>
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		<title>Escape to Reality &#187; marriage</title>
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		<title>Forsaking Your First Love: What Was the Ephesians’ Problem? (Rev 2:1-7)</title>
		<link>http://escapetoreality.org/2010/04/05/forsaking-your-first-love-what-was-the-ephesians%e2%80%99-problem-rev-21-7/</link>
		<comments>http://escapetoreality.org/2010/04/05/forsaking-your-first-love-what-was-the-ephesians%e2%80%99-problem-rev-21-7/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 Apr 2010 05:18:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Paul Ellis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible study]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[church]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mixing grace with works]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new covenant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sonship]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Camilla and I are celebrating our 11th wedding anniversary today. We were married on Easter Monday in 1999 and because Easter moves every year, this is our first anniversary to fall on an Easter Monday. So it’s an extra special day. By the grace of God it has been 11 years of heaven on earth. [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=escapetoreality.org&#038;blog=11813473&#038;post=471&#038;subd=escapetoreality&#038;ref=&#038;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://escapetoreality.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/paul_and_camilla_1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-479" title="Paul_and_Camilla_1" src="http://escapetoreality.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/paul_and_camilla_1.jpg?w=150&h=105" alt="" width="150" height="105" /></a>Camilla and I are celebrating our 11th wedding anniversary today. We were married on Easter Monday in 1999 and because Easter moves every year, this is our first anniversary to fall on an Easter Monday. So it’s an extra special day. By the grace of God it has been 11 years of heaven on earth. Every year has been better than the last.</p>
<p>So what’s all this about forsaking our first love?</p>
<p>In Revelations 2:4, Jesus accuses the Ephesian church of forsaking their first love. Sometimes this verse is used by preachers and songwriters to promote our love for God. “Remember your first love. Remember how much you loved Jesus at the beginning and go back to that. Love him like you used to.”</p>
<p>I totally don’t get that.</p>
<p>Imagine if someone said that to me about my love for Camilla. “Remember how you loved her in that first year and go back to that.” Sure, we loved each other with all our hearts. But since then our capacity for love has grown. Our hearts have gotten bigger and we love each other more deeply. Why? Because we’ve been through stuff. We&#8217;ve had babies together. We’ve faced death together. To go back to our first love would be a step backwards.</p>
<p>It’s the same with Jesus. I know and love Jesus more now than I ever did. We’ve been through some stuff, he and I. We’ve walked on the water and chased off demons together. We&#8217;ve been to the mountain-top and the valley floor. We’ve faced death together. He has always known me completely but each year I learn more about him and his limitless love for me.</p>
<p>Do you understand me when I say that every year Jesus just gets bigger and better!</p>
<p>For Jesus to say to the Ephesians that they had forsaken their first love, that they needed to repent and do the things they did at first, tells us that there was something seriously wrong with this church.</p>
<p>So what was wrong?<span id="more-471"></span></p>
<p>For those who equate “love” with “works”, it’s obvious that the Ephesians had lost their zeal. Perhaps their prayer meetings were lifeless. Perhaps they went about their works of service without any real enthusiasm. Sadly it’s not hard to find churches like this today.</p>
<p>The usual remedy is that churches like this need to straighten up and fly right. They need to confess their sin of apathy, repent and get earnest for Jesus. If they don’t, bad things are going to happen. Lampstands will be removed. Preach a message like this and soon the church will be back out on the street witnessing as if their lives depended on it. However, they will be zealous, but joyless. They will be earnest, but fruitless. And in a year or two they will be worn out and lifeless once again.</p>
<p>No, the real problem with the Ephesians was that they had lost something of their understanding of God’s love for them. They had forgotten that they were <a href="http://escapetoreality.org/2010/03/19/grace-and-love-in-the-chronicles-of-narnia/" target="_blank">beloved sons</a> of God. They were a busy church but their works were based on their love for God rather than His love for them.</p>
<p>Why do I say this?</p>
<p>In writing to the Ephesians Paul prayed that they would know the love <em>of</em> Christ (Eph 3:18). He did not pray that they would grow in their love <em>for</em> Christ. Some people think we are filled with the nature of God to the degree that we love God but that’s not what Paul said. He said we’re filled to the degree to which we know the love of Christ.</p>
<p>John, the <em>beloved</em> disciple, was at one time a member of the Ephesian church and he was famous for reminding people of the Father’s lavish love toward us. “Love comes from God” (1 Jn 4:7). “Real love isn’t our love for God, but his love for us” (1 Jn 4:10). Our love flows out of, and is a response to, his love. He is our love-source.</p>
<p>In Revelations 2:4 Jesus says to the Ephesians, “You have left your <em>protos agape</em>”, your foremost or primary love. What is the source of our <em>protos agape</em>? It is a revelation of Christ’s love for us.</p>
<p>Why do I say the Ephesians had become religious? Because Jesus commends their hard work but then says they’re not doing the things they did at first. So they’re working hard but to some extent is the wrong sort of work.</p>
<p>From this we can conclude that the Ephesians were a hard-working, non-loving church. That sounds a lot like a church that’s coming back under the law. They may have started out with grace but they are now trying to attain their goal by human effort.</p>
<p>Paul once told the Ephesians that they were seated with Christ in heavenly places but by the time of John’s revelation it seems they had forgotten this. They’re no longer resting, they are striving. In a sense they have fallen from that seat of heavenly rest to a place of earthly works. They have fallen from a great height of grace. They have become known for <em>their</em> works, not His. Like the Galatians they have perverted the gospel and are no longer living by faith. Like the Laodiceans they have mixed law with grace and ended up in a lukewarm muddle.</p>
<p>What’s the solution? Like the Galatians and the Laodiceans, they need to repent. They need to change their way of thinking. They need to change their theology. They need to do what they did at first which was presumably trust in the goodness and love of God as revealed in Jesus Christ.</p>
<p>What is the lesson for us?</p>
<p>We are called to be shining exhibits of God’s grace not tarnished testimonies of human effort. Like the Ephesians we need to do the work of God which “is believe in the one he has sent” (Jn 6:29). Faith in God is not displayed in human effort but in Holy Spirit power. We are called to reveal Christ not ourselves. A church that is walking in the revelation of God’s awesome grace will be seeing the the captives freed and the dead raised. The poor may be getting food parcels, but they&#8217;ll also be getting the good news preached to them and it will be setting them free. The sick may be getting hospital visits but they&#8217;ll also be getting healed by believers who believe that they have authority to heal in Jesus&#8217; name.</p>
<p>Jesus warned he would remove the Ephesians’ lampstand from its place. The lampstand refers to the church itself (Rev 1:20). Jesus’ warning applies to any church that tries to mix human effort with Divine grace. You cannot put the new wine of grace in a wineskin of human performance without something breaking. Eventually something will have to give.</p>
<p>It may be that the Ephesian church was in danger of fading into irrelevance. But I like to imagine that in this church there were some young nobodies who still knew the love of Christ and who were troubled by the increasing emphasis on performance and manipulation. In my experience it’s usually the older generation that calcifies and becomes religious. (God preserve me as I get older!) If the church didn’t corporately repent, perhaps these young nobodies went their own way and started a new church in some other location and left the old folks to their religious works. If so, the lampstand would have literally moved from its place.</p>
<p>A healthy church, like a healthy marriage, is one that has not forgotten its <em>protos agape</em>. It stands on the bedrock of Christ’s love for us. If your church (or your marriage) is not like that, then pray what Paul prayed:</p>
<p style="padding-left:30px;">I pray that you may have your roots and foundation in love, so that you, together with all God’s people, may have the power to understand how broad and long, how high and deep, is Christ’s love. Yes, may you come to know his love – although it can never be fully known – and so be completely filled with the very nature of God. (Eph 3:17-19, GNB)</p>
<p>_______</p>
<p>Postscript: If you&#8217;re wondering how we celebrated our anniversary, we&#8217;ve just returned from a very stiff 4 hour hike up and down some muddy hills. The perfect day!<br />
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<div><a href="http://escapetoreality.org/category/laodicean-church/feed/" target="_self">- The  Laodiceans (complete series)</a></div>
<div><a href="http://escapetoreality.org/2010/04/11/incomplete-deeds-the-zombie-church-of-sardis-rev-31-6/" target="_self">-  Incomplete deeds: The zombie church of Sardis (Rev  3:1-6)</a></div>
<div><a href="http://escapetoreality.org/2010/04/29/holding-fast-in-thyatira-the-seductress-versus-the-savior-rev-218-29/" target="_self">-  Holding fast in Thyatira: The seductress vs the  Savior (Rev 2:18-29)</a></div>
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		<title>Fireproof Your Marriage</title>
		<link>http://escapetoreality.org/2010/02/03/fireproof-your-marriage/</link>
		<comments>http://escapetoreality.org/2010/02/03/fireproof-your-marriage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 02 Feb 2010 20:00:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Paul Ellis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[men]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[movie reviews]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[In a recent post I wrote of the need to match our gifts with the mission and the message. Sherwood Baptist is a church that excels at this. They have people in their church with a gift for making movies that convey the message of the gospel to the lost. It began in 2002 with [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=escapetoreality.org&#038;blog=11813473&#038;post=42&#038;subd=escapetoreality&#038;ref=&#038;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://escapetoreality.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/fireproof.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-43" title="fireproof" src="http://escapetoreality.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/fireproof.jpg?w=102&h=150" alt="" width="102" height="150" /></a>In a <a href="http://escapetoreality.wordpress.com/2009/09/30/gifts-message-mission-lessons-from-2-timothy/" target="_self">recent post</a> I wrote of the need to match our gifts with the mission and the message. <a href="http://www.sherwoodbaptist.net/templates/cussherwoodbc/default.asp?id=33770" target="_blank">Sherwood Baptist</a> is a church that excels at this. They have people in their church with a gift for making movies that convey the message of the gospel to the lost.</p>
<p>It began in 2002 with a survey that revealed that 92% of American high-schoolers never go to church. They asked, how can we reach these people? Their answer was to make movies.<img title="More..." src="http://planetchurch.wordpress.com/wp-includes/js/tinymce/plugins/wordpress/img/trans.gif" alt="" /></p>
<p>Their first movie, <a href="http://www.flywheelthemovie.com/" target="_blank">Flywheel</a>, was made on the cheap and shown in the local cinema for six weeks. With the proceeds they made from that film they bought a new camera and made their second film <a href="http://www.facingthegiants.com/home.php" target="_blank">Facing the Giants</a>. It’s an excellent film made largely by ordinary church folk.</p>
<p>That film cost $100,000 to make and took in $10m at the box office. With some of that money they funded their third film <a href="http://www.fireproofthemovie.com/" target="_blank">Fireproof</a> which cost $500,000 to make, took in $50m at the box office, and the DVDs for which are currently like hot cakes.</p>
<p>Of course this is not about the money, but I find it significant that they have sown and reaped a hundredfold each time. God has blessed their faith ventures. Jesus once said “spend money to make eternal friends” (Luke 16:9) and Sherwood Baptist has done exactly that. Because they have successfully matched their gifts with the message and the mission, people are getting saved.</p>
<p>I watched Fireproof with Camilla on the weekend. It’s a film about making marriage work. Although I have seen a hundred marriages fractured then healed on the big screen, Fireproof has become the standard bearer. It is serious film that doesn’t rush through thorny issues that probably affect many marriages. Initially I expected something clichéd and Disneyfied but the story is far better than that. I won’t give anything away. If you’re serious about marriage, watch the film. If your marriage is based on a contract and not a covenant and you don&#8217;t know the difference, watch the film. Apparently it is touching thousands of lives. You can read about that <a href="http://fireproofthemovie.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">here</a>.</p>
<p>Aside from a great lesson, the movie contains an excellent soundtrack featuring Third Day, Grey Holiday, Casting Crowns and John Waller. And if you&#8217;re an old Growing Pains fan like me, you&#8217;ll be delighted to know that Kirk Cameron really can act!</p>
<p>When you’re done watching the movie, go to the special features on the DVD and watch Fireproof in 60. It’s hilarious.</p>
<p>For years Christian movies have been second-rate, cringeworthy affairs. Thankfully the creative folk at Sherwood Baptist have broken that mold with three well-made movies. Let&#8217;s hope there&#8217;s more to come.</p>
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