marriage

Is the Husband the Head of His Wife?

June 3, 2021 // 23 Comments

Headship is revealed in sacrifice. In the same way that Christ gave himself up for the church, the husband gives himself up for his wife. He crawls through traffic, fights grizzly bears, and catches bullets for her. [...]

Equality is not the Goal

February 13, 2021 // 28 Comments

You probably know that I have written a book about women. You may be wondering about my agenda. “What are Paul’s views on gender roles? Is he a complementarian or an egalitarian? Does he support traditional arrangements where the man is in charge or does he promote equality?” Full disclosure: I believe in [...]

Why the Woman of Proverbs 31 may not be your Ideal Wife

December 3, 2020 // 32 Comments

Many men and women have a mental list describing their ideal partner. “She’s got to be a good cook, enjoy watching sports, and not be a nag.” “He’s got to have a steady job, a nice car, and a mother who lives far away.” Some even invoke a Biblical basis for this sort of wish list. “Proverbs says, [...]

Submission doesn’t Mean what you Think it Means

October 7, 2020 // 10 Comments

Bad theology hurts women. Sometimes it even kills them. In his book Ten Lies the Church Tells Women, Lee Grady tells the story of a woman called Doris who suffered through an abusive marriage. Doris’s husband, the head deacon at their church, would sometimes come home from work in a rage and physically assault [...]

Who Submits in Marriage?

October 2, 2020 // 15 Comments

When Camilla and I were writing our wedding vows, my future wife told me that she had a problem with the word submit. We had dug up some traditional vows based on Ephesians 5:22: “I promise to love, cherish and submit to my husband as to the Lord.” “I’m not going to say that,” said Camilla. I didn’t [...]

Who’s Your Helper?

April 14, 2016 // 45 Comments

History turns on small hinges and there has been no greater turn than the fall of man as recorded in Genesis 3. Everything that is wrong with the world – war, disease, death, genocide – can be traced back to man’s rejection of God. So we might say the saddest verse in the Bible is found in Genesis 3. Except [...]

Jesus and divorce

January 22, 2015 // 111 Comments

In the past year I’ve had a couple of friends go through divorce and each time it has torn our hearts. I won’t go into details, but what has struck me is how some in the church have responded to these divorces. Let’s just say there has been an aroma and it has not been the fragrance of Jesus. Divorce seems [...]

Can Divorced People Remarry?

January 14, 2015 // 226 Comments

Hmm, that’s a tough one. Let me see. Can sinners be forgiven? Can runaways come home? Can crooks get a second chance? Can the broken be made whole? No, it’s not a tough question. It’s an easy question. Of course divorced people can remarry! These questions are only tough because religion has told us that [...]

Husbands’ hindered prayers (1 Peter 3:7)

January 7, 2015 // 75 Comments

A man recently asked me about a troubling verse. “My wife says my prayers are hindered because I don’t respect her enough.” He was referring to this verse: Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the [...]